Wednesday, May 29, 2013
Engaged: A Sister's Perspective
I will start at the very beginning. A very good place to start. (Thank you Sound of Music!)
In the summer of 2011, my sister told me of a random meeting with a handsome firefighter at Firehouse Subs no less. I think I replied something along the lines of, that was nice.....how was the sub?
A few weeks later I noticed that she was mentioning Lee A LOT. I could not ignore it anymore.
So, then I think I said something like, Yeah, yeah, I don't want to get involved unless it is serious.
But, in my heart I already knew it was serious. In my heart I already was thinking this Lee guy, he was going to change everything. I was a modern day Josephine March (Thank You Little Women).
As the monthly anniversary flowers got delivered, and my parents started talking about Lee more, the Fall came around. And because she is so very wise, my sister and Lee gave me time to adjust. I finally met Lee and Mel for breakfast on a cool November morning. He was kind, charming, funny, and just so real. I liked him. I was up front about explaining why I had needed to wait to meet him in person, but I told him and Mel that I could tell this was different. The oldest sister's seal of approval was given!
More time went by. Visits home, relationship advice and laughter. I got Lee's phone number and even sent him a random text or two. I remember when we rang in the New Year of 2012. One of the more memorable times when the 3 of us just hung out. And it was then, that I knew it. I knew that Lee and Melanie were meant to be. I knew that he was somehow the perfect combination for her. And somehow she was just right for him. And in that moment I was finally able to fully relax. I let out a deep breath I had been holding for months. I guess other older siblings (esp. sisters) understand what I was feeling. I was able to trust that Lee would and could take care of my sister in the way in which she needs and deserves. And considering Mel's kidney past, I had cared for her in ways that many siblings have never had to experience. Anyway, it was a momentous time.
This man, who was growing in God, he could take care of my sister. The things that were most important to Melanie, Lee cared for those things too. It is an amazing feeling, for a slightly overprotective sister, to step back and redefine a new season in her life.
More time went by, the ups and downs of life naturally flowed. My friends saw me change into a sister who truly had gone from skeptical to supportive. I had conversations with Lee and Melanie. Their love was obvious. Their personal growth was obvious. And every single last one of my qualms was laid to rest. Lee had gone over and beyond to show love and care for my family and he had shown genuine faith and love of God. There was not anything else I needed to concern myself with (because for good or bad, I like to concern myself with a lot of things).
And the Friday before the proposal, when Lee told me of his love for Melanie, and how she was his best friend, and how he wanted to build a life with her that would be full of memories that they could share as they grew older and sat in rocking chairs on the porch......well, I had to hold back my tears. And then Sunday. After hints and surprises, Lee proposed to my Mel! It was such a FUN day:) I have literally seen this love story take shape. I have been privileged to see my sister grow into a woman who is now ready and so willing to begin a new life with her future husband. At some moments it's surreal, Could the sister who has been my closest friend, could she REALLY be getting married?! Yup, she is, and I'm so proud of my girl:) Wedding planning, Stewart style, here we come!
Sunday, May 12, 2013
Lessons on Growing Up Part 1
1. Embrace change- Change is coming. It is already waiting in the
wings. And if you don't handle change well, then you will struggle as a
grown-up. This was and in some part, still is, me. But, I am changing for the better. Becoming less surprised when, despite my mind stamping a situation as permanent, it winds up as just a flash in the pan.
2. You determine a lot of how others treat you. As you grow up you get the power to select who gets to be around you. You often decide to stay or leave. So, you can look within and discover your own expectations.....they shape how others will treat you. You are the judge of how much you can put up with. And you also purposefully cultivate the positive relationships that bring joy.
3. Sometimes you will be speechless. And you probably know exactly what I mean;)
4. To grow up, you have to know how you handle pressure. Do you weep, drink, worry, ignore, work too hard, etc? You have to become aware of this in order to handle yourself when difficult times come.
5. Be proactive and less reactionary. This is a personal favorite. I would react to things in a consistent yet unhealthy way. Now, I try to catch some things before they blow up and spiral out of control. I am more aware of me.
2. You determine a lot of how others treat you. As you grow up you get the power to select who gets to be around you. You often decide to stay or leave. So, you can look within and discover your own expectations.....they shape how others will treat you. You are the judge of how much you can put up with. And you also purposefully cultivate the positive relationships that bring joy.
3. Sometimes you will be speechless. And you probably know exactly what I mean;)
4. To grow up, you have to know how you handle pressure. Do you weep, drink, worry, ignore, work too hard, etc? You have to become aware of this in order to handle yourself when difficult times come.
5. Be proactive and less reactionary. This is a personal favorite. I would react to things in a consistent yet unhealthy way. Now, I try to catch some things before they blow up and spiral out of control. I am more aware of me.
Saturday, May 11, 2013
Lessons on Growing Up- Intro
We casually ask children all of the time. What do you want to be when you grow up?
And they, full of joy, ramble off a laundry list of ideas and dreams and hopes and wishes. Then we praise them and encourage them to dream big and never give up.
Those same children grow up, but of course life jumps in. It starts to create paths and hills and valleys. And we have to start the journey, hopefully surrounded by our faith and family and friends. When we are young the group seems huge. Everywhere you look, there are supports and help.
And the children grow up. A little bruised and scraped but the journey keeps on going by. The years of life fly by and soon it's time for graduation caps and commencement speeches. And we ask again. Now that you are grown up, what will you be And we look kinda strangely at the brave souls who still dream and hope and wish. We remind them that health insurance and stability are important. We sometimes set limits for them, but allow them to live freely within a beautiful box. But, you see, it is still a box.
And so, the world of work begins. Mix that with growing up. And it is quite the wild ride. In just one year, I have grown up so much. My reactions have changed so drastically, that I can only attribute it to God working on my character.
The lessons on growing up are numerous. I keep mine written here and in my journal. I talk about them with family and friends. And my buddies in their 20's all seem to agree on some things.
I'll be sharing some of them as the spring blooms into summer:)
And they, full of joy, ramble off a laundry list of ideas and dreams and hopes and wishes. Then we praise them and encourage them to dream big and never give up.
Those same children grow up, but of course life jumps in. It starts to create paths and hills and valleys. And we have to start the journey, hopefully surrounded by our faith and family and friends. When we are young the group seems huge. Everywhere you look, there are supports and help.
And the children grow up. A little bruised and scraped but the journey keeps on going by. The years of life fly by and soon it's time for graduation caps and commencement speeches. And we ask again. Now that you are grown up, what will you be And we look kinda strangely at the brave souls who still dream and hope and wish. We remind them that health insurance and stability are important. We sometimes set limits for them, but allow them to live freely within a beautiful box. But, you see, it is still a box.
And so, the world of work begins. Mix that with growing up. And it is quite the wild ride. In just one year, I have grown up so much. My reactions have changed so drastically, that I can only attribute it to God working on my character.
The lessons on growing up are numerous. I keep mine written here and in my journal. I talk about them with family and friends. And my buddies in their 20's all seem to agree on some things.
I'll be sharing some of them as the spring blooms into summer:)
Sunday, May 5, 2013
April- Birthday & Friends
In the back of my mind I had this idea to combine my love of cooking with my love of friends.
So,
this year I want to diligently try and host one friend (or more) each
month. I want to cook for them and eat with them because these things
mean so much to me. And they deepen friendships. I just want to have fun
and food with my fabulous friends:)
In April I helped host a birthday brunch to welcome my 28th year. I worked with my aunt to plan a delicious celebration, and it was lovely. It really was! Some of my ATL friends and Melanie helped me celebrate. We ate and chatted and renewed friendships. I was happy and content and full of fond memories and such good food! I find it a joy to share food and meals with my friends and family. Oh what memories we make, and create times worth remembering for years to come!
Menu:
seafood breakfast quiche (YUM)
grits
biscuits
sausage & egg casserole
cinnamon/sugar crossiants
cheesecake cupcakes
fruit kabobs (Pinterest idea completed)
In April I helped host a birthday brunch to welcome my 28th year. I worked with my aunt to plan a delicious celebration, and it was lovely. It really was! Some of my ATL friends and Melanie helped me celebrate. We ate and chatted and renewed friendships. I was happy and content and full of fond memories and such good food! I find it a joy to share food and meals with my friends and family. Oh what memories we make, and create times worth remembering for years to come!
Menu:
seafood breakfast quiche (YUM)
grits
biscuits
sausage & egg casserole
cinnamon/sugar crossiants
cheesecake cupcakes
fruit kabobs (Pinterest idea completed)
Friday, May 3, 2013
Friday Tunes- Keane
I am headed home for quality time with my precious family! I have a blessed opportunity for a job interview next week! And this song is so catchy! Enjoy your Friday!
Thursday, April 25, 2013
Tuesday, April 23, 2013
27 was....
I'll be 28 on the 28th, very very soon! Just like every other year I am excited to see another birthday. I am thankful that I have the type of perspective that appreciates the wonder of growing older and celebrations!
If you are interested, I wrote about 25 here and 26 here.
OK! On, to my ponderings on 27.
27 was....
stressful. I have to start here because this was really kind of the theme of my 27th year. There have been worse times, but this year was difficult, trying, and filled to the brim with stress. Waiting for a job, then adjusting to a job, then getting beat down by a job, then looking for a new job. Yeah, the stress levels had risen mighty high during this year. And that is why I made my New Years Resolution to be a more peaceful Sabrina, because another year like this one, well I just hope that is not in the plans.
27 was ....
eye-opening. I have been shocked and surprised many times this year. Both extremely positive and extremely negative things have grabbed my attention. Positive: Children are resilient, and have this amazing and forgiving love to share. The kiddies have made the 27th year worth it all. And no matter what, it is for the children that I care the most. Negative: True poverty is another world. And I will never look out at this world of have and have-nots the same way, ever again. There are so many dangerous, scary and unfair situations right here in this great and blessed nation of America (nationally, by state, and by city).
27 was ....
a lesson in humility. Was I proud before this year? Yeah, I was. The good things and my God given talents had padded the way for me, and I had begun to find a lot of pride in the way of "Sabrina". It was not out of control, but it could have gotten there. I did not take enough time to look out beyond the scope of my life. I did not have much true understanding or compassion for those who were totally different than me. I think I was more pitying than compassionate. Interested but not compassionate. Grace and mercy were not daily parts of my life. But, as some of you know, I have changed this year. I had to change. And a more careful lady has emerged. I am cautious of broad, sweeping judgements, because I don't know it all. And even if I did, I still would not judge it right. The 27th year has been shared with my family and intimate friends. And I can write and share this now, because all I am doing is admitting something that we all can relate to. I am growing up and I am sometimes a mess;) But, I refuse to give up on the process. And I refuse to walk around blindly acting like I have it all together while it literally is crumbling away on some days and at some moments.
27 was....
unique. There has never been such a year in my life! Travels and friendships, teaching and being taught, counseling and being counseled. I've seen the waves of life rushing and receding all around me. I began to live in the moment and take it day by day. I let myself be surprised again. I choose Joy and with God's help, stared down Fear. I survived. I mean it....because at the very lowest point, when I had a bruise on my arm from being bitten by a child, and a bruise on my heart from that same child calling me a slut...to the positive changes of now.....whew! For a while I honestly feared I was not going to make it. And yet I did! That life experience, and many others that I won't share, all culminated in survival. So yeah, now that I've got your imagination working, I'll say it again. This year has been unique.
I needed this 27th year. But, I gladly look forward to what is ahead. Thanks to everyone who took a little time to read this "year in review". Oh, and Happy early Birthday to me:)
If you are interested, I wrote about 25 here and 26 here.
OK! On, to my ponderings on 27.
27 was....
stressful. I have to start here because this was really kind of the theme of my 27th year. There have been worse times, but this year was difficult, trying, and filled to the brim with stress. Waiting for a job, then adjusting to a job, then getting beat down by a job, then looking for a new job. Yeah, the stress levels had risen mighty high during this year. And that is why I made my New Years Resolution to be a more peaceful Sabrina, because another year like this one, well I just hope that is not in the plans.
27 was ....
eye-opening. I have been shocked and surprised many times this year. Both extremely positive and extremely negative things have grabbed my attention. Positive: Children are resilient, and have this amazing and forgiving love to share. The kiddies have made the 27th year worth it all. And no matter what, it is for the children that I care the most. Negative: True poverty is another world. And I will never look out at this world of have and have-nots the same way, ever again. There are so many dangerous, scary and unfair situations right here in this great and blessed nation of America (nationally, by state, and by city).
27 was ....
a lesson in humility. Was I proud before this year? Yeah, I was. The good things and my God given talents had padded the way for me, and I had begun to find a lot of pride in the way of "Sabrina". It was not out of control, but it could have gotten there. I did not take enough time to look out beyond the scope of my life. I did not have much true understanding or compassion for those who were totally different than me. I think I was more pitying than compassionate. Interested but not compassionate. Grace and mercy were not daily parts of my life. But, as some of you know, I have changed this year. I had to change. And a more careful lady has emerged. I am cautious of broad, sweeping judgements, because I don't know it all. And even if I did, I still would not judge it right. The 27th year has been shared with my family and intimate friends. And I can write and share this now, because all I am doing is admitting something that we all can relate to. I am growing up and I am sometimes a mess;) But, I refuse to give up on the process. And I refuse to walk around blindly acting like I have it all together while it literally is crumbling away on some days and at some moments.
27 was....
unique. There has never been such a year in my life! Travels and friendships, teaching and being taught, counseling and being counseled. I've seen the waves of life rushing and receding all around me. I began to live in the moment and take it day by day. I let myself be surprised again. I choose Joy and with God's help, stared down Fear. I survived. I mean it....because at the very lowest point, when I had a bruise on my arm from being bitten by a child, and a bruise on my heart from that same child calling me a slut...to the positive changes of now.....whew! For a while I honestly feared I was not going to make it. And yet I did! That life experience, and many others that I won't share, all culminated in survival. So yeah, now that I've got your imagination working, I'll say it again. This year has been unique.
I needed this 27th year. But, I gladly look forward to what is ahead. Thanks to everyone who took a little time to read this "year in review". Oh, and Happy early Birthday to me:)
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