Friday, March 27, 2015

Friday Nights

You don't even know how much you can crave a voice until you know that you won't hear it again this side of eternity.

This is week 3 of me having a tough, sad time on Friday night. It was on a Friday we had the funeral, and I don't memories flood my soul on Friday night for some reason.

The tears are good for me. I always tell my babies at work, that it's OK to cry, and that it's OK to miss someone.....those things mean that you really loved them. And so it is for me, my tears are proof that this heart yearns for my grandma so much. My missing her is a testament to the life that she lived and the devotion she showed her family.

The time will go by. It always does. Life gets loud and busy. Distractions literally land in my lap. But in the quiet of the evening, when things are still. My mind and spirit remember, and they just downright mourn the fact that I don't have any grandparents anymore. In the evenings, on Fridays, I feel lonely, even if I am around other people.

So this Friday night I will face the feelings. Just go ahead and let myself be sad for a while. And in the morning, I will rise to a new day, to a life that is rich in what counts. To sunshine and cool breezes. But tonight I miss my grandma a lot. I would love a hug and to hear "I love you Brina!" and I want to kiss that beautiful face and say "I love you grandma!" and hug her tight and sit and laugh and share life with her.

Friday nights.....sigh....Friday nights....

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